(This content can have a significant impact on your life…)

Prolific author James Scott Bell teaches that when we write characters in books, they are always living in and responding from one of three roles: parent, child, or adult. 

The Parent…

The parent informs in an above-you teaching kind of way, can be dismissive (which comes off as arrogance), tells off/scolds, occupies a superior stance that can be placating, and “parents” in the way he/she/they interacts with others.

The Child

The child whines, insists, sounds off, cajoles, goes too long to try to get what he/she/they wants, name calls, has fits, wants his/her/their way, and “acts childish.”

The Adult

The adult listens, thinks, and responds; he/she/they considers, gives information believed to be helpful, and allows for mistakes with grace yet holds accountable with kindness — acting “adult” to solve, help, and move forward.

Truths for Life…

Truth 1:

At any point in time, we are all living within one of these three roles. People who are aware, mature, and care for others choose adult.

Truth 2:

When any two people assume two different roles, conflict arises. Check it out. The position might be parent-child, adult-child, parent-adult, or whatever… but on some level, if the interaction isn’t adult-adult, the outcome is the same: conflict.

Let’s be adults. The end.

Erin M. Brown, MA, MFA, is the author of 10 books (fiction, nonfiction, academic, children’s) and has been a professional writer/editor of books for 20+ years, helping authors master story writing through seminars, coaching, and dozens of online courses. She has a terminal degree in Creative Writing, Genre Fiction, and has been a content writing expert/marketing director and storyteller for websites, videos, and multiple online programs for 20+ years. Erin was also a university writing instructor two times and Lead Writing Curriculum developer for a third university, as well as developing multiple college writing curricula and programs. Speaking to audiences on writing since the 80’s, Erin’s a member of the Science Fiction & Fantasy Writers of America (SFWA), Authors Guild (AG), Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI), and Romance Writers of America (RWA). Erin has also worked with Hollywood A-Listers in story development, judged numerous book and anthology contests, and has been a first and second tier judge for the Vivians/Ritas with RWA. Coffee mug or espresso in hand and surrounded by her collies, Erin writes from Michigan, USA.